Lesson Learned

James got his birthday present a week early this year. And I learned an important lesson: 4 year olds can't keep secrets. Well, mine can't anyway.

I got James a ukelele and idiotically let the kids see it before I hid it away in the workroom.

That was Friday. We had a busy day and went over to Irene in the evening. We stayed late, drank mint juleps and the kids got good and tired. Messy too. When we finally came home around 10, I stuck the kids in the bath to wear them out a bit more.

James got Bea out of the bath and talked to her about settling down for bedtime. She said,"First I want to play the ukelele."

Said James, "We don't have a ukelele, honey. Do you even know what a uke is?"

"Yes, Daddy," said she. "It's like a guitar, but very little. And we do have one."

At this point, it was getting unfair. She knew she was right and James was saying she was wrong and she was getting mad. So I intervened.

"Bea, if we have a ukelele, where is it?"

"It is in the workroom, but we just have to find it!"

James put her down and she ran out there, but she didn't know where it was hidden. I discretely pointed and she pulled out a uke shaped box! Oh, you should have seen the look on James' face!!! It was so perfect! We all screamed and clapped and laughed.

Now the house is even more full of music. :)

FTP

Nap time has gotten shorter and shorter for my kids! But today I had just enough time to patch my old jeans. They are wearable again!

Also, check out the great design on my t-shirt. It is by a friend from Greenpeace Action Camp.

Home

I started to feel really hemmed in recently. Most days, I am in our house all day with both kids because we have just the one car that James takes to work. There are so many huge things going on in the world from Snowden to Istanbul to DOMA and Wendy. But it's all I can do to get these children fed and exercised and most days even that is a struggle. Things have been hard with Bea.

But I don't want to feel hemmed in. This life is my choice and I need to just make the best of it for what it is now. This too shall pass. Every time we go to anywhere, people tell me to "enjoy them while they are young because they grow up so fast." I just smile.

Anyway, while we were stuck here this week, I finally moved in!

We've been here well over a year now, yet our living room walls were bare and our sofa had no pillows. Recently new neighbor stopped by and she asked if we just moved in. Yeah, it was bad.

The first thing I did was cover this chair. We call it the Hudson Chair because Hudson's the one who pulled it out a dumpster back when we lived in Charleston. The seat and back have stains and holes, but these cushions cover them right up:

Then I put some art on the walls. It is all either by myownself or people we know:

Then I covered every pillow I could find with fabric I had lying around, re-arranged some chairs, hung up more art and brought in some plants!

I made a special corner for the kids. It is for when they get too mad to participate in family life and need to cool down. It has books. So far Amby hasn't had to sit there, but Bea spends a lot of time in it!

Distraction

James and I are pretty stressed out these days. Parenting a difficult child is not for the faint of heart and it is taking its toll on the both of us. While James was away, I bore the brunt of the burden and now my nerves are more or less shot.

SO.

I am distracting myself by imagining a new look.

I wouldn't go pastel with it, but I think my natural chestnut would carry it just fine. I could let it swoop across my face, curl it and have it all wild on top, make a nice wave, slick it back like Tilda Swinton...

Thoughts?

(more images here)

Finally!

James is coming home today. Oh, we've missed him! All you folks who wait at home for deployed partners, I salute you! A long weekend is too long for me. I did wear ugly dresses, I did drink beer and I painted. But I only painted a little.

The kids and I stayed around the house mostly (James drove up to WV in our only car). We went over to see the in-laws and my folks for Father's Day. And we went to Irene yesterday to plant some veggies. 

Bea and Am have done pretty well. I've been a little obsessed with their sleep schedules because I need bedtime to be easy when James isn't here. It's been ok, but I've had a kid in the bed with me each night. 

Now's My Chance

James is being a do-gooder for a long (through Tuesday!) weekend. So I have more free time than usual. When I say free time, I mean after hours. During the day, I'm a single mom. O.o

So now is my chance to do the things I don't do when my husband is around. I am going to drink beer, wear ugly dresses and paint a lot. And I'm going to try to ignore the little voice in the back of my head reminding me that there's no way I'll be as productive as James was last week when I was away –he finished an album. Not just any album, but one that may very well be my all time favorite, ever, ever. 

reading / listening

How to Dream

I've thought more about dreams and dreaming since my recent post on the subject. Each night, I look forward to great adventures, yet it doesn't always happen. There's no guarantee. But going nights without dreams seems like such a waste, right? So to avoid it, I try these tricks:

1. Daydream. It gets the juices flowing and provides a continual source of amusement throughout each day. Remember the heroine of Daphne du Maurier's Rebecca? She daydreamt so much that at times she couldn't tell dream from memory. That's the goal. (In addition to daydreaming during waking hours, try daydreaming yourself to sleep at night. I know it really easy to just think about projects and stress about daytime worries, but try this instead and see where you end up!)

2. When you do dream, write it down or at least tell someone. That helps you remember, but also boosts your dreamability confidence.

3. Set an alarm to go off a couple hours before you plan to rise. When you go back to sleep? That's prime dream real estate.

4. Don't drink too much. You'll just sleep too hard to dream at all.

5. Read lots of books.

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